No drama

It has absolutely been a long while.

 

I don’t even know when my last entry was.

 

So how am I?

So far, things have been great. A little stagnant but rather that than any chaos I can’t handle.

I’m typically drama-free the past few months and the only drama I am getting is probably from TV series or from some reality tv that I am so hooked on.

I haven’t had a boyfriend yet and I am not intending to.

I have a secret to share and …I hope you don’t judge me.

 

I have this guy that I am talking to. He’s from Australia….

And we got to know each other through the app Okcupid. It’s been a while since I got to know him (I think it’s almost 2 years) and we’ve talked and skype a couple of times.

There were a couple of times that we were some sort of ‘intimate’ with this guy and I regret it every time I succumb to it. I don’t know if it’s guilt from how I was brought up or guilt from being intimate with someone whom I don’t even know.

It kinds of makes me feel like I’m cheap…and so dirty.

But he’s been nice as well. I mean, if I said no, he wouldn’t push it and I feel good. But because of this ‘intimate’ moment, it kind of scare me a little to meet him in real life. I don’t want to view like an object, you know?

Still, this could all be in my brain.

He have come and gone in Singapore before and suggested to meet but I got so freaked out that I deliberately took overtime at work so I could avoid meeting him and not lie to him.

What is wrong with me?

I think the root of the cause could be that…I just don’t want to lose my viginity so easily. Granted I am 27 and it’s about high time, but I just feel fear.

As much as I am a normal woman with horny needs, I have a fear of having a baby. Recent events have brought to life how big of a fear it is.

And also, as much as I AM A CONFIDENT woman, I have so much issue with my body. I don’t love it and I don’t see myself being able to strip naked and let the guy love my body.

I don’t know what to do.

He has suggested that I go to Australia and he could show me around and that seem pretty convenient too as I am planning to travel alone. He doesn’t seem to have any malicious intention so far.

I don’t know. This is hard.

 

Anyways, talk about having no drama in my life. Ha ha.

 
Also, I am very much in love with Charlie Puth. And if you don't know him, you probably know the song called "See you again" for the movie Fast and Furious 7.

You know the part you know? The Chorus?

That's Charlie Puth right there.

He's amazeballs.

It's March?!!!

Can anyone believe that we have entered and almost leaving the 3rd month of this year?

Everything is moving so fast and it's as if time is trying to chase on me being 30.

Yikes.

The big THREE AND O.

I am still a virgin if anyone of you are still wondering.

If, even, anyone ever read this blog of mine.

To bring you up to date, I am not going to my London trip after all (Shucks, I know!). Due to the changes at work, I had to delay my arrival to the city to next year. I will probably tell you about it once I am closer to the timeline.

Hopefully, it will work out.

Anyways, all these money I've saved now can go to something I've been meaning to do. Get a gym membership. I am going to go to see Virgin Active at Raffles Place with my bestie for life, Isabella. I've done my research and I hope it work out this time. Planning to visit the gym 3 times a week and also, try to change my eating habits.

2015 is still looking good.

I still have an amazing job and we have a few newbies joining us and I really can feel my seniority with all the knowledge I have collated all these few years I've been with the company.  I am getting more attached to people I see at work and I find myself suggesting to hang out with each other (which never ever happens) and making jokes with my colleagues.

I really do love my job and leaving it is the last thing on my mind.

So, I am not broke all the time and I do get to hang out with buddies once in a while.

Life is still good.