HOW TO WRITE THIS.

How do I write this without regretting it later? To even pen this thoughts is difficult. I wanted to write in a journal but.... I feel so lonely in my journal.

Its just me, myself and I there.

Its amazing how I am just sitting here trying to write something that truly have been hurting me but thinking of ways to avoid writing insensitively.

Because when it comes to hurting me, people just say what they want to say.

It must be the glorified feeling one can get when I put my head down and just shut my mouth up.

Most of the time, things said to me catch me off guard and all I can do is feel the pain riding up my chest, slowly spreading out.

I wanted to defend myself but it will just appear calculated.

I wanna die. Kill myself.