its 5 am and...

It's 5 am and I decided to write something about life and the journey we all have with it.

I understand that Life can be something that is nasty and mean because I have been in a boat where Life made hope something that no one should ever lean on. It made death so much more welcoming that sometimes I would cry in tremendous pain asking why death have not came to rescue me.

But Life have been great too. The bad are numerous and uneventful but when Life decided to give back...it gives back huge.

For without the pain and trouble Life had put me through...I would not know the difference between people who use me and people who love me. I would not have friends who I treasure so dearly in my heart today if I didn't have friends who used me till no end.

I am sure that I, sometimes, come up a bit irritating. Always so optimistic about the future. Always seeing the glass half full. Even I get irritated with myself because no matter how many time life burnt my hope for sunshine, I still lean on to hope.

I believe that everybody is a star. Yes, one of those in the sky. Strong, bright...a life of it's own. Not stealing from the sun. It's not easy to make everyone see that in themselves. But I wish everyone would...because I believe I am to.

I will admit that Life do destroy me sometimes. Breaks me into a million pieces. My heart shattered. My tears creating a river. Life have tortured me....and is still torturing me. But here I am. Still standing. Still hoping. It's true, you know. What doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.

The thing is, nobody told us how difficult being strong is. But Life made us realize that there is no other way. The only way to be happy is to be strong and to believe because in the middle of us believing and life destroying us...in that split second, we're happy. All those fantasies...all those dreams....in that moment we see the beautiful happenings.

So that is why I still hope and still look forward to the future (although I am not sure what I am looking forward to) because in this moment before Life comes to take it all away, I am truly happy. I might be a singer (audition) I might be great at it. Heck, I might even end up with Onew.

In this very moment.....I am happy.