Carla sniffed as she wiped her tears; she was watching her favourite movie, ‘A Walk To Remember.’ Carla felt that it was the best movie made all time. It was touching and sincere. The movie always made her cry; no matter how many times she watched it. When, finally, ‘Landen’ asked ‘Jamie’ to marry him; Carla cried some more. She wondered when that day was going to happen to her. She looked at her cell phone; it still was just showing her the wallpaper. She sigh; she had already text messaged Daniel saying that she was sorry. She guesses that it wasn’t enough as the evidence was that Daniel did not even reply her. Carla tried calling but it was ignored. In the end Carla just gave up and started to watch the movie that was already ending right then.
Suddenly, somebody knocked on her door. Carla, who was wiping her tears stood up to open the door. She was so shocked to see the person standing at the door that she froze, the tissue still on one of her eyes. Daniel stood there, slightly amused and slightly guilty look on his face.
“Daniel, I tried calling you but you did not answer. I text you but I guess you did not received it. There must be something wrong with the reception because you did not reply me.” Carla stopped to take her breath but before she could even continue, Daniel spoke.
“Are you going to let me in? Or am I suppose to stand outside all night?” Daniel asked, smiling at her. Carla moved aside from the door to let Daniel in. She closed the door once he was inside the room. Carla followed and sat beside him on the bed. Daniel touched her hand and holds it in his. Carla just looked at him, she couldn’t find any words to say to him.
“I am sorry.” Daniel said with a sigh.
“No, it’s ok.”
“No it’s not. I know it’s been hard on you and I should have known.” Daniel had let go of her hand, Carla looked for signs in his eyes but it was impassive. Was he going to break up with her? Was it even a break up if you only had one day of that relationship?
“Are you breaking up with me?” Carla let out her thoughts to Daniel. She could not handle being clueless any longer. If he wanted to end it, he should just say it and not beat around the bush. Carla did not think she can go through the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ break up speech.
“Of course not, how can you think that? I love you, Carla.” Carla’s heart skipped a beat. Daniel just said the ‘L’ word. It seemed like in that year, she could not believe what had already happened. Daniel looked at her as if wanting her to say something but, as it always happen, Carla seemed to be out of words again. So Daniel took his chance to explain.
“Yes, I know it’s hard to believe but I love you, Carla. No paper, no rumour and no other girl can change the way I feel for you. I am not going to ask you to bare with all these nonsense that will be appearing as long as we are together but I just need you to trust in me. Have a little faith in me and yourself, babe.” Daniel said as he stroke Carla’s hair. She felt herself smile and glow. It was amazing to hear Daniel soothe her, calming her. Daniel took her face in his hand and pushed her gently to him and like magic, they kissed. Carla thought she heard fireworks working in her head. It was like as if her brain circuit was blown away every time Daniel lips touched hers. She could feel Daniels hands wrapping around her waist. She gripped on his shoulders for support when the kiss went to mind blowing over-drive. If she hadn’t hold on, she was pretty sure she would have fallen even though she was sitting. Finally, after ages or aeons or at the speed of lightning; Carla could never tell, they broke apart. Carla opened her eyes and look at Daniel’s face. He was beaming at her like a small child given a sweet.
“Why are you smiling at me like that?” Carla asked as she pushed away gently but Daniel did not let go.
“Do you know that you drive me wild every time we kissed? I mean, seriously.”
“Of course, I am a wild girl.” The both of them laughed. Daniel looked at the television, still holding on to Carla. Then Carla rested her head on his chest and let out a deep sigh.
“I am so glad we’re together.” Daniel hugged her even tighter.
When Carla woke up, she was so happy to see Daniel’s face facing her. He was still in deep sleep; he decided to sleep with her. When she says sleep, she really meant sleep. In the literal form. Carla just lie on her side of her bed and stared into Daniel’s sleeping face, taking every inch of his face with her eyes. The masculine jaw he had, the eyes that were big though they were tight shut at that moment, the lips that always send shockwave throughout her body whenever it was in contact with her lips. Carla smiled; how could she ever thought that it was a heavy price to pay to be his girlfriend? She felt herself so light at that moment. Carla got up from her bed to make some tea, she was feeling the need to rejuvenate. She took one last look at Daniel and walked to the kitchen that was in her suite room.
Carla sipped the tea while reading the newspaper. There was another news about Daniel and her but she did not let it get to her. Suddenly, she felt Daniel kissed her cheek. She looked up, Daniel was beaming at her.
“Nice sleep?” Carla asked as Daniel sat down and poured himself some tea.
“Yeah, it was great. I dream about my mother.”
“Hmm.... maybe you miss her?” Daniel shook his head at this suggestion. Carla could not understand why Daniel would change the topic every time they came too close on the topic of Daniel’s mother. But Carla only shrugged and continued to read the article about Daniel and her. Then, after a few minutes of silent, the door was knocked. Carla got up and opened the door; it was Jenny.
Jenny said hi to Daniel who merely waved back, then she dragged Carla away from Daniel to get a privacy chat.
“What is he doing here?” jenny asked, concern etched on her face.
“He slept here last night. Don’t get me wrong, we just really slept.” Carla explained. jenny sat down one the bed and looked at Carla seriously. Carla shifted her gaze; she felt as if she was being scanned for the truth. Even though Carla knew that she was telling the truth, it was still uncomfortable.
“Anyway, I am here to bring you news. You GCEs result are out. You will receive it in the later afternoon today. So you have to meet me at five o’clock.” Carla felt her heartbeat stopped. She could not breath. The result was out; now she would know if she could continue with college. She remembered when she was in the examination hall, taking the test. At that point, it all seemed quite easy, now thinking about it, she could have done a whole lot of mistake. She didn’t know, she didn’t had the time to check.
The day went by as if time was bewitched to move two times faster than usual. Carla just had another full day of interviews. She kept giving up wrong answers as she was not concentrating. She felt like that day was the worst day of her life and yesterday’s confusion was nothing compared to the confusion she was feeling at that very moment. Carla breath in slowly as she press the lift button. She waited for a whole of one minute, finally, the lift came. Carla pressed the level where jenny’s room was situated; level 5. When Carla reached at the front door of Jenny’s room, she was still contemplating on whether she should know it. Did she really wanted to know her result? But before she could answer that question, Jenny opened the door. The envelope at one hand.
“Come in, then I will give you this.” Jenny said as she shook the hand that held the letter of result. Carla could not talk, nevertheless, she went in. Carla sat on the edge as Jenny sat beside her and gave her the letter. Carla took it and stared at it as if it could be torn itself.
“Open it! Come on, carla. It can’t be that bad.” Jenny said, excited. Carla slowly tore of the envelope. When it was open enough to take out the letter, carla, once again, just stared at the content. Jenny gave her a litte nudge.
“So this is it, huh?” carla said in a whisper.
“Come on, just read it. Get over it.”
Carla took out her result slip and stared at it with all her brain power, drinking all of the words on the little piece of paper. Tears started to well up her eyes.
GCSEs RESULT SLIP
CARLA DIANNE GARNER HAS ACHIEVED
ENGLISH A*
MATHEMATICS A*
SCIENCE/ BIOLOGY B
FRENCH A
ADDITIONAL MATHEMATICS A*
HISTORY A*
“Oh my god, carla. This is real good.” Jenny said after reading the result with carla. Carla wiped off the tears of joy that slipped down her cheeks. She could not believed that her dream had came true. She had enough to go take her GCE A. Carla was so overwhelmed with happiness that she gave Jenny a hug which was return. She felt really great; the day was turning out better that she had expected.

Yo what's up, people? I feel so good! hahaha! I think chapter 8 is great.I have finished it. I hope you guys like it....My editors ( U NOE WHO U ARE) tell me what you think, ok?
so here it is, you guys.

Chapter 8
Carla woke up with bliss; she had so much fun yesterday at the after-movie party. She remembered dancing with Sophia who was a great dancer. Sophia was so surprised with the news that Daniel and Carla was a couple that she went to asked Carla; demanding to know whether it was true.
“Yeah, It’s true.” Carla remembered saying. Sophia gave Carla a big sisterly hugged after Carla said that. It was as if in Carla’s happiness lies Sophia’s happiness as well. Carla smiled as she reminisces last night. She looked at the clock on her night table; it was eight o’clock. Carla got out of her bed to go to the bathroom. She had to attend a conference about the movie in two hours time; she had better be ready for it. Carla thanked the heaven silently in her heart for the casualness that is allowed for the conference; she still remembered the hassle she had gone through just for the movie premier yesterday. It was something she did not want to go through ever again.
Carla got out of the bathroom after an hour of soaking herself in the warm water. She felt rejuvenated and fresh however when she looked at her clock, she panic a little. She was going to be really late of she did not get dress soon. Carla quickly slipped on her khaki pants and her shirt. She did nothing to her hair except combed it, with a last bit of putting lip gloss, Carla went out of her suite, rushing.
Just as she was rushing to the lift, Carla’s mother got out of her room.
“Mom, I am so glad I get to see you!” Carla exclaimed as she hugged her mother. Mrs. Garner hugged her daughter back, tightly. Carla let go and looked up at the face that always give her calmness and harmony.
“Go, honey, before jenny screams downstairs and report a missing person case to the police.” Mrs. Garner said, jokingly. Carla slapped her forehead. She forgot about her promised she made to jenny last night. She had promised to meet her at the lobby by nine in the morning. It was already half past nine. Carla rushed down by stairs, luckily her room was situated on the third floor. When, finally, she reached the lobby, she found jenny sitting in one of the sofas in the lobby reading the newspaper.
“Oh my god, Jenny, I am so sorry. I really forgot about this meeting with you.” Carla apologised. She sat on the sofa in front of Jenny’s. Jenny was still reading the newspaper intently, was this a sign that Jenny was, finally angry, with Carla? Jenny had never once scolded Carla for her mistake. She was always an encouraging friend. Carla just sat there, breathing in the awkward air that surrounded Jenny and her. Finally, Jenny looked up.
“You should read this.” Jenny said as she passed the newspaper to Carla. Carla looked at the front page. She could not believe her eyes or the picture that was in the front page. It was the picture of Daniel and herself kissing with Emma Watson picture beside it. If the picture was bad enough, Carla was in for a rough surprise, the headline said; ‘HAS DANIEL LOST HIS MIND?’ Carla did not understand the heading. Lost his mind? What could that possibly mean, Carla thought to herself. After reading the sub headline, comprehension started to dawn her. She held back her tears as she read more, drinking poison about her written in the news paper.
HAS DANIEL LOST HIS MIND?
Daniel Choose an ugly duckling to a swan?
Yesterday was a big day for the cast of ‘Behind The Scene’ , the premier of the movie was a major success. With the line up of fans in front of the theatre even before the movie aired would be more than evidence. ‘Behind The Scene’ is a story worthy to watch by anyone from the young age to anyone who has wrinkles coming out of control. It shows the mature side of Daniel Radcliffe and, yes, he can act other role just as well as he act harry potter. It was also a big day for new comer, Carla Garner, her performance wowed the audience like never before. You can see that she is passionate for acting and that could be the reason why Daniel Radcliffe chose her to be his girlfriend.
That’s true, people. He declared yesterday that Carla garner is his girlfriend. But why did he chose somebody who is nothing compared to Emma Watson? Who is just as passionate about acting and who is much more beautiful.
Carla could not read any longer. She felt her eyes stinging but still she held back the tears that were threatening to come out and pour down her cheeks. She looked at Jenny who was looking at her with a look of disgust and sympathy. Carla wanted to laugh at her expression; how could anyone have both of the expression on their faces at once. Jenny took the paper away from Carla’s hands.
“Well, I think that is all bull. I cannot believe that London times even let that crap get published.”
“It’s true, isn’t it? Emma is prettier than me. I should have known, Jenny. It is the price I have to pay being Daniel’s girl. Now the conference is going to be about why Daniel chose me. I feel sick...” Carla said as she touched her forehead, “am I having a fever?”
“Carla, don’t be ridiculous. You’re going to the conference and you’re not backing out. Don’t be so paranoid; trust in yourself, Daniel likes you. He chose you. He didn’t even chose, Emma was not his girlfriend and she won’t be. You can’t let the rumours get to you; you’ve got to be strong.”
If that was supposed to make Carla feel better, it did not once she was in the conference room. Not only was she bombarded with questions that were so irrelevant to the movie but she was getting paranoid at everything including Daniel. Every time she tried to get Daniel’s eye, he seemed to be avoiding her gaze. Was it true that Daniel has second thoughts? Or was it just her that realized Daniel did not look at her the whole time they were there. Carla was so deep in her thoughts that she did not hear the question that was for her until Mr. Dean nudged her.
“Oh, I am so sorry. What’s your question again?” She asked the reporter who was standing with a pen and notepad in her hands.
“How it feels being able to act in such a major production and being chosen from all the other girls that auditioned?”
“I have to say it feels really amazing. When I came to the open casting in London, there were so many other girls who were dying to get the role. When I found out that I was selected, I was thrilled and surprised at the same time. Now that I have acted in this movie, I can’t wait for the second movie to be film.” Carla finished. Finally, Daniel looked at her and wink. Carla smiled. All hope was not lost, then.
After the conference, the actors were lead out of the room to another room where they were supposed to give a one to one interview. Carla was feeling a little squeamish, she did not want to go through the whole Emma vs. Carla questions; she had enough for the day. She decided to skip the whole one to one interview and was about to walk out of the room when suddenly Daniel took her hands whilst she was walking.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I can’t stand this, Daniel. All the question about Emma and you. Questions that is irrelevant to the movie, about being your girlfriend. How can you stand that? People asking you why you pick me? The girl who is nothing compared to the great Emma Watson. Not that she’s not nice but still, you know.” Carla said. She hated that she sounded so pitiful but she could not help but feel a little depressed.
“Babe, you can’t let this get to you...”
“Easy for you to say; you’re not in my shoes, Dan. I am like the girl who stole you from Emma Watson by putting some voodoo magic.” Carla said feeling angry. Daniel just did not understand the things she had to go through for just being his girlfriend but before Daniel could retort, Carla’s name was called for the one to one interview. Carla walked away from Daniel, leaving him with his retort stuck inside his brain.
When Carla went in the room, she saw an Asian woman coming up to her to shake her hands. Carla shook her hands but could not put up a smile; she felt frustrated by how everyone was asking her to be strong. Carla sat at the opposite seat, facing the interviewee. The Woman in front of her beamed and looked at her clipboard. Then looked at Carla again.
“Hi, my name is Fiona Xie. I am from Singapore and I would be reporting the interview today with you for the magazine 8 days. So, congratulations on the success of the movie. How do you feel being able to be a part of it?”
“It’s feels really good. I never imagine that it was going to be huge. I mean, some of my friends did tell me the movie was talked about everywhere but I never thought that it was going to be this huge. I cannot put in words of how I feel to be a part of this but one think I am sure is that, I guess, I am lucky to have this experience. Really lucky.”
“Ok. Were you intimidated at all when you knew that Daniel Radcliffe was going to act as your love interest?”
“Of course,” both the reporter and Carla laughed, “it was really a surprised. When I went for the open casting, I really had no idea I am going to act alongside with him. It was not until I saw him in the producer’s office. I almost fainted there and then. It was really a shock.”
The interview went on and on. Carla felt, amazingly, light headed all through that day. Fiona, the reporter, was kind and she only interviewed about the movie. They laughed at some ridiculous moments Carla experienced while filming the movie and talk seriously about the career Carla could see herself in. Finally, the interview came to an end and it was a whole fifteen minutes. Fiona said thanks and shook Carla’s hands as Carla went of the room.
The place was empty except for Jenny who was sitting in the corner, reading a magazine. Carla went to her and tapped her shoulder. Jenny looked up from the magazine.
“So how was it?” Jenny asked as she pick up her bag and walked out of the room with carla tagging along.
“It was fine. The reporter was nice. Nothing about Daniel and me, at least. I think this whole relationship with him is not going on well. I just vent my frustration on him before i went in that interview.” Carla said glumly. She recalled the look on daniel’s face when he could not say what he was thinking. Would Daniel forgive her for that hurtful words she just spat at him? Carla exhaled loudly as they reached the lift.
“Don’t be too harsh on yourself. What relationship has no problems in it? It’s just a little misunderstanding. I am sure the both of you could work it out.” Jenny said. The lift door opened and the both of them went in. Carla was silently praying with all her might that Jenny was right.

Oh god....runnning out of ideas!!! Well here's chapter 7. It's a little short but bare with me, aight? Chapter eight will be alot of better.

Chapter 7
Carla could see flashes of light from cameras outside of the movie theatre. She was holding her breath, as the car got nearer to the red carpet. She could not believe what she was seeing; there was so many people surrounding the theatre. She looked at Daniel, who was looking at her with an expression of amusement.
“What?” Carla asked him, he just shrugged and looked away, smiling away. Carla frowned but let it pass, tonight was the night where Carla wanted to feel famous. She finally had that chance now and she was not going to spoil it. Or, in any case, let anyone spoil it for her. She took Daniel’s hand in hers and he turned with a little shock look on his face. Carla smiled and gave him a kiss on the mouth. Daniel kissed her back then they broke apart, smiling.
“You ready?” Daniel asked as the car came to a stop.
“As I will ever be.” Carla replied as Daniel opened the door. The first sound that came to her ears was the screams that could have had London tumbled over. She looked around, flashes of lights were everywhere. People screaming her name, waving at her as if they knew her, were everywhere. She was so overwhelmed with the situations that she could have stood there looking stunned all night but, luckily, Daniel was accustomed to the situation that he pulled her to the red carpet. They stopped for awhile to let the people take pictures of them. Daniel placed his hands at her waist and smiled. Carla looked at him with admiration; he was so confident and strong. Then Daniel looked at Carla, before she even knew it, he kissed her. In front of everyone. Distantly, Carla could hear people wolf whistle and clapping, flashes of light going out of control but it didn’t matter, all that matter was Daniel by her side.
The movie was great, she could not believe that she had acted so well. It was a touching story and she could hear people sniffing at the last part where ‘Rose’ and ‘John’ were united. When the credits rolled up, people stood up and clapped for them. Carla was so touch that she almost wanted to cry but she hold back her tears as she did not want to smudge her mascara; she remembered the hassle that she had gone through to achieve ‘Smokey’ eyes. All the producers and actors were asked to go to the front to answer a few questions. Carla saw Sophia when she was walking down the aisle to the front. Sophia beamed at her and gave Carla a hug when they were in close contact.
“Mister Dean, who came up with this wonderful idea of showing people what really happens behind the scene of the life of a superstar and a movie?” asked one of the audiences.
“People always wanted to know about a superstar’s life and behind the scene moments. So I thought; why not give them what they want? So the idea came naturally.” Mr. Dean said, smiling. The audience clapped and the host picked another audience for one last question.
“This one is for Daniel,” Said another audience who was chosen by the host, “Are you and Emma Watson dating?” Carla felt herself getting red; it might just sound just like a question but Carla still got a little hurt by how woefully ignorant some people can get. Didn’t the both of them just kissed outside in front of so many people, fans, paparazzi and the whole universe?
“No. I don’t know how many times I must say this. Emma and I are good friends, that’s all there ever can be. But if you would want to know, I have a girlfriend,” Daniel puts his hand around Carla’s waist, he beamed, “she’s Carla Garner.” Carla could feel herself getting red, she just hoped that it did not show. People all around started applauding, even carla’s mother.
“Carla do you have anything to say?” The host asked.
“Well, um, I want to say thanks to everyone here for coming to catch the movie.” The audience applaud so loud that carla was pretty sure that the floor moved. Then she could feel daniel’s breath in her ears, she leaned in closer so she could hear him whisper.
“Time to party.”

Hey, what's up? I am doing well, just went out to study with Hafizah and Razia! Had fun... Razia and I discussed about the shift of identity in KING LEAR. Did you know that it is a better way to vocal out your ideas to a person on what you think about the book. It' really help. I found out Raz's idea and I thought wow, some of her ideas I didn't even thought before. We agreed that EDMUND are CORDELIA are the only two who lived up to their identity. Edmund really became a bastard and Cordelia, well she knew who she was and who she loved, she did not even need to voice it out about her love to KING LEAR, as she knew words could not describe what she was feeling but too bad KING LEAR was so into himself that he did not understand why CORDELIA could not praise him for being such a good father.
We both also agreed that KING LEAR lost his identity as a King when he started to go mad. As he does not know who he is or he can't accept what he had become. That's when the 1-2-3 of identity comes in. You see to actually own an identity, there's a need of sense of self. And KING LEAR lost that and gain a new identity, a common man. When he was a common man, he started to see the reality that he could not possibly have seen when he was a King.
Yeah, I hoped that helped some people...If you beg to differ, please tag me as I want to get more ideas.....Ok I have done chapter 6...Hope you guys like it....Tag me and tell me what you think.

Chapter 6
“Yes, Daniel. I’d missed you too but look at the bright side, we will be meeting tomorrow!” Carla said to the phone. It’ been six months since she met Daniel, they parted with a last kiss they shared. Carla smiled at that nostalgia. She could hear Daniel sigh at the other end.
“Are you going to hold my hand?” Daniel asked.
“What, to the premier? Are you sure you want people to know? I mean Daniel, you’re big. And you’re already 18. The paparazzi are going to get excited. They’ll be sneaking on us. I mean, you’ve seen the paper about us kissing, after the filming, outside the studio. They said a lot of nasty things.” Carla remembered when she read the paper the next day when she was at the comfort of her bed. She could not believe the headline; “DANIEL HAVE A THING WITH CO-ACTRESS.” She remembered picking up the phone and calling up Daniel, crying. Daniel said it was all part of being famous. Carla thought differed. She thought it was a price being with him but they weren’t a couple or anything. They were just dating.
“What do you consider me as, Carla?”
“What do you mean? I consider you more than a friend.”
“Then hold my hand tomorrow. We will go together, I missed you too much. The video conferencing is not enough. I need to see you; I longed to kiss you every time I see you on the screen. I want all of them to know, you’re my girlfriend.” Daniel said, fast. When the word sink in Carla’s brain, her heart started to beat or they stopped, Carla was not sure. Did Daniel just call her his girlfriend? She could not believe her ears, they must’ve deceived her but, and even so, why was her heart hammering like mad as if they have been fluttered? She knew her heart would not lie to her.
“Blimey Daniel, how can I be your girlfriend? We are so far apart. 8 hours apart to be honest,” Carla said, “you could find another girl, Daniel. I like you but it’s going to be difficult.” Carla could not believe that she was rejecting Daniel. The guy she wanted to be with every fibre of her body. How can she do this to herself? How could she be the one hurting her heart again when all the while it has been nothing but honest with her. Daniel kept silent on the other side of the line. Carla only understood one thing, she was doing this because she did not want to jeopardise Daniel’s career with her holding him back. If they become an item, Carla would want much of his time which he would be unable to give; he already had another project under his belt right after the filming. Not to mention the last of ‘Harry Potter’ movie series. It’s all time consuming; she could already the downfall of the relationship before it even started.
“Carls, baby, I know it’s going to be difficult. But you’re going to be big too, trust me. Then you’re always needed for London. If for six months we can still like each other without meeting, what’s so wrong with another few years? Or what’s wrong with forever? My feelings have developed for you Carla, and if anything, I am the one who has a lot of to lose.” Daniel said to her, Carla smiled, Daniel always help her when her mind is feeling confused and always know how to take away the fear of the future. She felt so happy and with all the fears gone, she agreed to go to the premier of ‘Behind The Scene’ with her. Holding hands, of course.
The next day, Carla woke up early, the dress which was a gift from Prada was hanging in her room, and she loved it when it was first sent to her. She could not believe that it was made to fit her, it was gorgeously in pale pink and the dress length was just above her knees. Not too short and not too long. Whilst admiring that beautiful creation, somebody knocked on the door, and came in Jenny, she brought along a makeup artist with her and two stylists.
“Come on, Carla. Go and take a bath, you stink. We have to be out of the house by 1 pm. The premier starts at nine. And you do remember it’s an 8 hour drive.” Jenny said as she pushed Carla to her bathroom.
“But Daniel said...” Carla, again, was cut.
“I know. He’ll be here by 12. Your mom is given a free ride by the producers. Come on! It’s already seven!”
Carla was confused, getting her ready would not take so long but she soon realize what a hassle it was to get ready for the premier. It was tremendously long and every detailed mattered. Carla was getting agitated with the stylist, they could not decide on what hairstyle she should get. They tried straight, but it just looked like she’s going for a “normal prom night”, they tried the curls but it just look ridiculous on her head.
“Oh my god! Jeremy what is going on here? It’s almost half past twelve and you’re not doing anything with the hair.” Jenny exclaimed, freaking out.
“Jeremy, why don’t you just bun my hair? I think it would look a lot more my age and modern. Is Daniel here yet?” Carla asked Jenny as she felt her hair being combed ferociously as Jeremy was the kind who did like to be told. She could feel her hair being twisted but still she looked at Jenny for answer.
“He’s downstairs, honey.”
“What!” Carla exclaimed, the only thing that kept her from jumping out of her seat was Jeremy; he was tightening the bun so tight that it actually kept her head from moving. Jenny looked at Jeremy’s hand with repulsion.
“You sure that’s not hurting?,” Jenny asked indicating Carla’s head, when Carla did not answer, she continued, “he said that he did not want to spoil the surprise waiting for him.”
“Waiting for him? Does he expect anything from me? But I did not buy anything.”
“Not with things. He wants to see how beautiful you are. Don’t worry, he’s not a prat.” Jenny said as she went out of the room. Carla looked at her reflection. She looked the same except a little different with all the makeup and the hair which was in a tight bun but at the same time it looked loose with all the fringes that came out from the side and her front. Other than that, she looked almost the same. Nothing special. What if Daniel expects her to look like Emma Watson who was gorgeous? Daniel could not possibly thought that Emma Watson as the standard to beat, if he does then Carla thought that he was out of his mind.
“You’re supposed to wear your shoes already.” Jeremy said as he, too, went of the room. Carla slipped on her shoes. They were heels but it was not so high; Carla did not want to tire herself. She walked out of her room and slowly, she saw the tip of Daniel’s head then his shoulders then slowly his whole body when Carla was right behind of him. Carla tapped his shoulder, he turned. He looked at Carla the way he never did before. Carla would find it a little strange if Daniel did not looked so dashing. The more Carla looked at him, the more she wanted more. It was as if she was drinking water after a marathon.
“You looked really beautiful.” Daniel said as he came closer to Carla.
“Daniel, don’t lie. I looked the same.” Carla said, looking at his eyes. They were so blue like an ocean.
“Yeah, I know. That’s the reason why.” Daniel said as he kissed Carla. Cara kissed him back with the longing of the past 6 months. She put her arms around his neck and his hands on her waist. It was just as powerful, if not even stronger.

Hey, everyone! What's up? Well, for me it's been a bad day. I have fallen sick and now I have flu. Looks like another sleepless night for me. I don't know why this has to happen every weekend! I feel likes there is a presence in my room right now but maybe it's just me. Hahaha, I don't know what I am talking about, I am just babbling nonsense!
For everybody who have been reading my story, I have great news for you! I have written chapter 5! It's a tinny weeny long but I hope you like it.

Chapter 5

Days became weeks and weeks became months, the movie filming was almost coming to an end, Carla was feeling a little depressed. She had so much fun the last few months and she was not going to see all the wonderful people she had encounter during the filming again. Sophia bush really was a bigger sister that Carla never had. The both of them had so much fun together and they shared secrets about boys, Carla laughed at that thought by herself. Then there was Daniel, the superstar turned into friend turned into something else. Carla was attracted to him like a magnet but she did not tell him. It would sound so cliché, he was a superstar and falling for him would not be a good idea as he might think that she is just another typical girl. She was, after all, a ‘Harry Potter’ fan. Carla was so deep in her thoughts that she did not hear Daniel coming up to her. They were supposed to be doing the last bit of filming for the next three days, and today was the kissing scene.
“Carla, come on.” Daniel said as he came nearer to her. Carla did not make a single move nor did she seem to notice that Daniel was even there. Daniel smiled and tapped Carla’s shoulder, which seem to wake her up from dreamland.
“Did you say something, Dan?” Carla asked, a little dizzy after that day dream.
“Yeah, come on, filming is going to start.” Daniel said as he took Carla’s hand and walked out of the changing room. Carla still had that tingling excitement whenever Daniel touched her. It seems to make her want to tell him her deepest desire. Carla walked past Sophia’s changing room, it was locked. Sophia had already gone home as her part was done. Carla had to stay till the end as she was the main character and the ending was the kissing scene, Carla did not understand why the director wanted three whole days for this part. However, Carla smiled. This would only mean that Carla would get to kiss Daniel again and again which would be great. She reminisced the first time they kissed (professionally, of course), it was really awesome. Daniel was a great kisser, even Bonnie; the girl who acted as Ginny, said so.
They reached the studio without Carla noticing. The director came to them and talked about angles and how he wanted the scene to go about. Carla nodded calmly which was in contrast with how her heart was beating; fast and excited. When finally the filming start, Carla was so nervous the she forgot her lines and they had to retake the scene so many times that the director was so annoyed that her asked to take a break. Even Daniel seems to be a little agitated by her anxiousness. Carla went to the bathroom and breath calmly. What was wrong with her? Rehearsal was fine, so why was she acting like she doesn’t want to finish this scene. Because you don’t, you want to see Daniel again. If the filming ended, so does the friendship, a little voice said in her mind. Carla looked at her reflection. She have to do the filming right today and put her selfish wants aside. There were still two more days before she and Daniel part. There was still time. Carla walked out of the bathroom and to the studio.
“Adam, I am ready.” Carla said to her director, who was sipping coffee.
“You sure,” Adam asked, Carla nodded her head, “ok then, take your position. Daniel!” Daniel came to Carla’s front, he gave her an encouraging smile.
“So, you ready?” he whispered, Carla nodded. Every time, she thought about what Daniel and her were about to do, her vocabulary seems to always go missing.
“Ok, everyone, we’re about to start,” Adam shouted, “camera?”
“Rolling.”
“3-2-1 action!”
“Rose, I never thought I see you again.” Daniel said, or John said.
“Well, I never dream that I would too but I have something to say to you, john. I missed you. I need you to be with me. I love you.” Carla or Rose said.
“I love you too.” And Daniel’s lips touched Carla’s, they kissed. Fire erupted like never before in Carla’s body. She could feel herself melting away and at the same time became solid. Time passed like a rocket and the kiss deepened. She could feel Daniel’s hand at the back of her neck, gripping on to her as if he did not want to let her go. She tightened her hold on Daniel’s shoulder.
“Cut!” shouted Adam. Daniel and Carla broke apart. Daniel touched his lips, Carla touched her head, she felt a little dizzy and it took a few seconds before she realized what was happening. She could not believe that the kiss was going to be so powerful, it was as if her longing was in the kiss. Adam came jogging towards them.
“That was great, you guys! Wow! I have never seen such chemistry before! Ok then, it’s been 6 hours already, I guess you guys should go and have a rest. Tomorrow, I guess would be the last day. I don’t think there’s a need if you acted like just now. Good job again.” With that Adam left them together. Carla was looking at her foot, what had just happened? The kiss did not felt professional at all. There was so much passion in it, so much longing and so much fire. Carla’s mind was going on a whirlwind contemplation. Daniel tapped her shoulder for the second time that day, Carla looked up at his face. He seemed to have recovered or maybe her did not felt anything at the very first place. Maybe it was only Carla who felt like the world had melted away or tumbled over.
“You want to grab some food?” he asked.
“No.” Carla replied. She needs to stay away from Daniel if she did not want to fall him. She did not want to bruise her heart again. She started to walk to her towards the lift with Daniel tagging along behind her.
“No? Are you ok, Carla?”
“Yeah, I am fine. I am just a little tired, Dan.” The both of them were waiting for the lift. Finally, after 1 minute of silent agony between Carla and Daniel, the lift came and it’s door opened. Carla and Daniel went through and press number 5; the level where the changing rooms were.
“That was some kiss you gave me.” Daniel said as he turned to face Carla. Carla could feel herself blush at the comment. Daniel seemed to come closer and Carla backed away even though her heart was telling her not to. Well, her heart did not need to tell her as the lift was small and she could feel the cold metal was against her back. Carla could not back away any further. The lift door opened but Daniel did not go out instead he puts his hand at both side of Carla so that it acted as a cage. Carla looked down at her shoes, they seem to become very interesting at that moment.
“Carla, I felt it and I know you did too. The kiss was so strong, it’s impossible that you did not feel it. There’s only one reason why it was powerful but I need to hear it from you.” Daniel said, the lift door had closed, the oxygen level was going lower and yet Carla did not speak.
“If you’re not talking to me, Carla. We might die in here unless someone press the button for the lift which I doubt it. At least for the next 15 minutes, we might be suffocating by then.” Daniel said, jokingly. This made Carla smiled but it vanished once she looked at Daniel’s face.
“What do you want me to say, Daniel? That I like you?,” Carla asked, Daniel kept silent, “yes, I do, ok? Happy? Now you’re just going to think I am a little silly girl and...” Carla was cut because Daniel put a finger on her lips.
“I do not think that. I like you too.” Daniel said and with that he kissed Carla again. This time Carla was sure that it was not only her heart in that kiss, she could feel Daniel’s too. The both of them kiss passionately as if there was no tomorrow. When they finally broke apart, Carla pressed the ‘open’ button.
“I needed to do that, if not we would die because of kissing. Literally.” Carla said as the both of them went out of the lift together. With a little more than friendship in their hearts.

Chapter 4
“Rose, why did you sign up for being someone else’s slave?” Sophia Bush asked, or more of her character did.
“It’s not a slave job, Manda. It’s internship. You don’t understand.” Carla said reading her script. It has been almost 4 hours doing the rehearsal. Carla seem to blend in, it was not as bad as she thought it would be.
“So who is the person you are going to look after, huh?” Sophia asked again.
“I’ve got, well it says in the programme here, John Antonio.”
“What! Are you serious?”
“Cut! Ok, that was good both of you. Carla you need to be more the character, not that you’re not feeling it but there is room for improvement. Soph, the accent need to be refined because we do not want audience to suspect how come Amanda which is your character is an American and her sister a Briton,” the director, Adam Wright said, “so let’s go to scene 65, ok Daniel are you ready?”
“Yup.” Daniel said, smiling an encouraging smile. This was the romantic part; Carla felt her body tensing up again. Not cool, Carla, she thought. When the director said “action” Carla was so surprised that she dropped her script. She quickly picked it up and turned to scene 65; Daniel was already reading his part.
“So how come you are still here? Everyone is already at the party, the movie was a success and everyone is invited to that party.”
“Well, I don’t feel like going. I am leaving the next day for the internship programme.” Carla said, Daniel acted to be surprised and looked at Carla looking confused.
“Oh, yeah. I forgot you’re on an internship, I think you’re going to get this job. You are really cool and I found you interesting. And I still do.” Daniel said, flirtingly. The script said Carla’s character needed her to stay silent and blush, but that could not possibly be done then, that day was only for script reading.
“Ok cut! Good. Carla I can see improvement, and Daniel, you’re good but I need you to be more romantic, ok? What time is it? ,” Adam asked, everyone mumble “noon”, “Ok then, that’s it for today and make sure you know the lines by next week. There is no rehearsal tomorrow as it’s the weekend and Carla, your tuition starts at 5 this afternoon. So see you guys on Monday!”
Everybody was packing up, Sophia Bush was so elegant, unlike Carla, and she seems to float around when she was walking. How Carla envied her. When Carla walked outside, Jenny was not there. She had to rush back to the agency for something “urgent”. So Carla was by herself again then she saw Daniel walking up to her when she turned around.
“So where you want to have lunch?” he asked as he put his water bottle in his bag. Carla was so stunned that Daniel was asking her that question that she just looked at him, stoned. Daniel smiled at her and waved his hand in front of her face. Carla got back to reality.
“Um...I don’t mind. Anywhere is ok.” Carla said as she felt herself blushing. She still can’t help it, Daniel was still so cute.
“Good because I have a surprise for you.”
“Daniel, I can’t hang out that late because I have tuition and I need to learn the lines and everything..” Carla was cut by Daniel.
“Chill, Carla. I know, come on, she’s waiting.” Daniel said as he grabbed her hand and led her downstairs. She? Who could ‘she’ be?, Carla thought to herself. But still, the weight of Daniel’s hand on hers was enough to get that thought out of her head. Finally, they reach downstairs. Carla mouth just dropped open when she finally knew who ‘she’ was.
“Daniel, you liar! I have been waiting for ages and who is this gorgeous friend of yours?” Emma Watson asked, smiling. Emma Watson was there and Carla just felt the world trembled or maybe it was just her, shaking out of excitement.
Carla shook Emma’s hand and she was still in shock so she really could not find her voice to say hello to Emma but Emma seemed to understand.
“Harry potter fan, huh?” she asked Daniel, he just nodded.
“A true blue one.” Carla said, finally able to find her voice. Emma laughed and asked them to sit down at the canteen. Daniel sat next to her. Carla took out her diary and pen, turn over a blank page and put it on the table.
“Can you both autograph for me please?” Both Emma and Daniel laughed but autographed the diary, nonetheless.

Hey peeps! What's up? Sorry for the lack of update, just been busy, you know. It's hard...trying to cope but everyday brings dreadness but still I have to go through it. For everyone who have been supporting me and my story, I want to say a huge thanks and I will put up Chapter 4 as soon as possible. Lately, I have been reading fan fiction of Harry Potter, I think I am going crazy. I just can't let it go even though it's over. Harry Potter books and movies are like drugs to me and I am addicted to it, big time. I think I really need saving! But Harry Potter books and movies had help me in the past with some of my personal problems. So I guess it's alright.
So there's this guy I am crushing on, he is so cute! Every morning, I would see him...And I saw him in the library yesterday, wow! He was so close and yet so far! I wish to get to know him but you know this insecurity always makes me stand back and just admire him from afar....what a waste...if I could just take out my heart and let him hear it, I guess I would not have the agony of just watching him from afar. Haiz, what a life....
Tomorrow's teacher's day, some of my friends are going back to their secondary school to pay a visit to old teachers, I don't have time at all. Ok that's a lie, I don't have teachers in my secondary school that I want to meet....Well, maybe Mr. Roslan but I have not stepped in HOUGANG SECONDARY for soooooooo long...I think it would be a little AWKWARD!!!
Ok I guess that's it....

Chapter 3
Carla rolled over her bed for the umpteenth time, she was so nervous about the rehearsal tomorrow. She read the script right after the so called ‘professional date’ with Daniel. He made her really comfortable but still, Carla could not hide her excitement, Daniel was after all a superstar. When she read the script, she got all nervous. Her character called Rose was a Personal stylist intern. She was supposed to be the makeup and stylist for the movie and Daniel was supposed to be the actor who did not like acting but was forced for that career because of his dad’s dying wish. In the middle, her character and Daniel’s kisses. This was why she was worried. Was she a good enough kisser? What if Daniel didn’t like it and withdraws? Well, at least, if he really does that then Carla had nothing to lose because Daniel would have to kiss her to know how bad a kisser she thinks she is, Carla smiled at this thought. Then the answer came to her like magic. She just knew who can help her with this crisis.
“But mum, you never kissed me. How do you know?” Carla asked, twisting the telephone cord, biting her lower lip.
“Honey, if you were a bad kisser Jordan would have broken up with you or he would have told you. Men are like that, they would not want to kiss a bad kisser while women would not mind as it is always the heart we see- “
“Mom. Please, I really do not need the feminist talk right now. Mom, I am so nervous. I mean all the actors and actress have already acted major movies and me? I have only done school productions! That’s not the worst part, there’s going to be another girl acting as my sister and guess who it is? It's Sophia Bush! Can you believe that? I think I have made myself another hole to fall in.” Carla said, panicking. She heard her mother sigh on the other line.
“Honey, do not sell yourself short. You did not buy your way through the casting. You were chosen. It’s that so hard to believe? Listen, just do what you have always been doing and I am sure you will be just fine.” Carla’s mother told her consoling. After more comforting words from her mother, Carla said good night and hung up the phone. She felt better and fell into deep sleep which turned into a nightmare at once. About Daniel shouting and asking Carla to be replaced by somebody who can kiss.....
The next day, Carla went to the rehearsal studio an hour early. Even though she was early there were a lot of people in the canteen. She saw Jenny and quickly sat down with her,
“Morning, Carla. How’s the room? Comfy?” Jenny asked.
“Yeah, it’s fine. So what are you doing here so early? I thought rehearsal doesn’t start till 9?” Carla asked, curious. Jenny just shrugged and Carla took that as something not to be interested with. She grabbed a bite from Jenny’s sandwich and ate silently as she looked around, observing.
People were everywhere. Some were reading the script, some talking and laughing, others were just so sleepy that they put their heads on the table and slept. Carla wondered if Daniel was awake, he probably was sleeping and not worrying about anything. He had acted so many times that Carla was sure this production was an easy task for him. The mood became more and more intense as 9 o’clock seem to draw nearer and nearer. Everybody seem to be going to the studio, set and rehearsal room. When it was 8:55, Carla’s blood circulation seemed to have stopped circulating because she could feel her whole body getting numb.
“Ok, time to go. Come on, Carla.” Jenny said as she got up. Carla got up in silence; she did not know what to do. Is this the end of her life? What if she really messed up? “It’s only the rehearsal, you can make mistakes. Don’t worry.” Jenny said as she patted Carla’s shoulders and led on to the rehearsal room or studio, some might say. Carla just walked on and took deep breaths to stop her from fainting and running out of the exit door like the way she wanted to so badly.

Hey peeps, so what's up? I found something that I think might make your day if you're feeling sad....and even if you're not sad, I guess it will make you laugh and smirk cause you know how true this is:
Before the marriage
HE: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
SHE: Do you want me to leave?
HE: NO! Don't even think about it.
SHE: Do you love me?
HE: Of course!
SHE: Have you ever cheated on me?
HE: NO! Why you even asking?
SHE: Will you kiss me?
HE: Yes!
SHE: Will you hit me?
HE: No way! I'm not such kind of person!
SHE: Can I trust you?
Now after the marriage read it from bottom to the top !!!!
Hmm, I guess it will make marriage less appealing now, huh? Well, not to me. I know that it is sometimes true. Your feelings will change once you're married because you are stuck with one person but I do't know, I still find marriage a beautiful thing. A little fairytale in this harsh world. Finaly, you found someone you can share your burden, happiness, love, heart, soul, money and everything with. Now, wouldn't that be awesome? I also think that it makes you a better person. To stay in a marriage, to call a stranger your own, forever, is not easy. It's no more about "I", it's about "US" now. Wow!!! That would be great....How i wish someone would just ask me to marry him...I will be of course so thrilled!! He doesn't even have to plan a wedding, I don't really care! We can save all that money and go on a Grand HONEYMOON trip! It woul be so much worthwhile! HAHA HAHA...I am dreaming too much....I need a 'wake-me-up' potion
So yesterday was the MI art festival. I had a ball, I was shouting my lungs out so much but, wonderfully bless that I have always been, I did not have a sore throat. My buddies who performed did really well, if not better than all the rehearsal, and I was proud of them!!
To:
Isabella and christine, you guys were wonderful and I can see talent in there some where!! Keep on dancing babes!
Hafizah, I love love love your malay dance. It was the best of all dancing act! everything was so precise and in order...not to mention all the cute 5 malay boys in that act!!!
Maisha( Is that how your name is spelt?), I love your voice! Can I borrow it sometimes....even the 'bad' microphone could not have hidden your true talent! The performance was great and sincere, almost wanted to cry!
Shima, love your performance. babe! Strong voice and good charisma on stage!
Melvin, the pianist that wowed me everytime, love the way you played the piano for that anime song...brought me to tears during the rehearsal and made me think of my ex...wait that's not a good thing!! But you amazing!

So yeah, to the rest of the performers who gave their heart and soul to the concert last night, great job, everyone! I was so excited yesterday that i think my talent is a moral suppoert cause I AM VERY GOOD A SUPPORTING! hehehe...the funny thing as I even told our principal, Mr. Tan that I should be the commmander of the school. He said he'll keep that in mind. Yeah, right. He probably forgotten me by now. So anyway, did I tell you another one of my classmate is dropping out of school? Yeah, and that classmate is none other than Max. Wonder how many more classmate would have to dropout before it's my turn. I hope I can make it this year. Not in the mood to retain. It's not my thing, retaining. I never have been retained my whole life except the fact that I failed O levels and had to take it again. Other than that, never ever in my life. So i hope history does not repeat itelf. I love this life now, schooling and the two best friends I made. I am not willing to lose that.

Hey peeps, what's going on people. Today was a great day because I feel so free...No homework!! And no more project!!! I hope tomorrow won't be so hard. It's getting harder by the day with school. More bad news, Max is going to withdraw...hmm tempting me to withdraw too but since I want to be a lawyer that's not an option and I don't want to give up so fast. I know I can make it. It's too early to give up now and too late to turn back the time. I need do this for myself because I deserve the best and no one else can give the best to me except myself.
So, I've been braiding Christine's hair and I am really getting good at it. Ha hahaha!!! It took me more than two years to learn braiding and now I am finally good at it....It feels good to know i achieve something even though it's jst braiding. So tomorrow is the art fest!!! I can't wait to see both of my best friends performing HAHAHAHA. They are quite good but since they are only 10 seconds performance their talent have been limited.
So I guess that's about it.....blog in when something really awesome happens...like someone declaring his love for me....hahahahaha

The journey to the office studio was nerve wrecking, every time the car stopped, Carla would ask if they had reached yet. She was supposed to meet the whole cast. As she was the female lead, she had to meet the executive producer and work out a schedule and make arrangements on where she was going to stay for the rest of the filming days.
“Can we stop to grab something to eat? It’s been 8 hours Jen, and I don’t see London in sight. I am so hungry.” Carla complained as she rubbed her stomach.
“No, we can’t. We are almost there, just hang in there for a moment.” Jenny said, a little agitated as it was the fifth time during the drive that Carla asked the same question. Jenny knew that Carla was nervous and so was she. If this movie is a success, then Carla’s life is set and so is Jenny’s life. No more paying the rent of her awful apartment. Finally, they arrived at the studio. Carla was rubbing her hand to keep them warm as she came out to the cold. Jenny and Carla walked into the lobby and were greeted by the receptionist.
“Ah, Miss Garner, we have been waiting for you. Mr. Dean is waiting for you in his office at level 3.” Said the receptionist. Carla looked over her shoulder and saw Jenny not moving to follow her to the office.
“Aren’t you going to follow me? You’re my agent, aren’t you?” Carla asked, puzzled.
“No, I can’t. I am just in charge of you.” Jenny said and with the encouraging look on Jenny’s face, Carla went upstairs to the office alone, her heart beating so hard with every step. As the lift door opened she saw the oak made door and knocked it three times.
“Come in.” Said a voice from inside. Carla opened the door and her heart just went to major rapid overdrive on seeing the people inside of the room.
It was none other than Daniel Radcliffe. The famous ‘Harry Potter’. Carla could hardly breathe, this was the guy that she had been dying to meet her whole life, not to mention all her trips to different parts of the world just to see him in the many premieres of the ‘Harry Potter’ movie series, and now there he was sitting innocently and waving at her. Carla moved step by step, breathing slowly so she won’t hyperventilate and humiliate herself because right then she could feel her heart pumping right up to her throat, wanting to come out and shout her deepest desire to Daniel. She sat at the chair the exec showed.
“So, Daniel, this is Miss Carla garner. She’s new but very talented.” Mr. Dean the executive producer said. Daniel smiled at Carla and took out a hand to shake. Carla, trembling, took the hand and smiled back. She was never going to wash her right hand again.
“Daniel here would be playing the lead man role, Carla. So, you both are the major reason if the show is going to be a success but with great actors and actress that you both really are, I don’t see the reason why this movie is not going to be a success. Anyway, we have to make arrangements on where you both would be staying and when the filming will start. You have 3 months of rehearsal then the real filming will start. Since it’s a series, you both might be coming back again for the second movie. So here’s the copy of your schedule, food and others would be paid by Warner Brothers, so no worries. You can go or take leave when given notice and Carla; you will have to attend to 3 hrs of teaching, preparing for your GCSEs. So, tomorrow, the rehearsal will start. Please do not be late...”
Daniel and Carla went out of the office after the briefing that could have gone on forever. She still could not believe that she was going to be acting side by side with Daniel Radcliffe. She kept pinching herself silently as they went down together in the lift just to make sure that she was not dreaming. The pain that her hand felt confirmed that she was not dreaming and Daniel was real, as he tapped her shoulder once the lift door opened while Carla was heading to Jenny who was waiting for her while reading a magazine.
“So, want to grab a coffee? To get to know each other. I mean it’s not a date but since we are going to be acting lovers, I don’t want you to feel nervous, like you are now.” Daniel said, gently. Carla nodded and followed Daniel to the cafeteria. How could she have felt so glum today morning? The Jordan-crisis seem centuries ago. God is always fair, Carla thought to herself, smiling.

The 7 is hot!

Oh look I am beside No, 4!!!!!!!! I think He's Freakin smokin hot!!!

Chapter 1
The summer was ending soon and yet Carla's love story was not yet complete. It felt like her world had tumbled into a big giant hole. If only she knew that Jordan was a sleazebag, she would not have dated him, period. She could not believe that Jordan hit on her best friend but she did not want to believe that her friend would lie to her. They’ve known each other for so long and their friendship would not permit one lying to each other. Carla could feel tears running down her cheek. Jordan has been the most amazing thing that had happened in her life. It was difficult to think that it had already ended. The thought taunted her like an imaginary stalker, only this time it’s not scary, it hurts.
Carla wiped her never ending falling tears; she had made up her mind. School is going to start in less than 48 hours. She has to get ready her things. She had not even bought the new book needed in secondary school. She was in the finalyear and would be taking her GCSEs, she must stop this burning feeling from making her achieve the result she had been aiming all her life. Straight As.
The door was knocked three times. Her mother, a beautiful woman to Carla, pop her head in.
“Honey, you agent is on the phone. She said it’s urgent.” Said Mrs. Garner. Carla scratched her head, wondering. Why would her agent call her? She could not have possibly gotten a role for the open audition she went to. She was not that great of an actress. She had an audition only for one open casting for the summer. A production by Warner Brothers. A movie that was supposedly to be called ‘Behind The Scenes’. Carla wanted a smaller role. The role of the cleaner because the script were so much easier but Jenny, her agent, said she had talent and to go for the lead role. It felt awkward remembering all the beautiful girls lining up, crowding around the small waiting room. Waiting for their name to be called but after that awful breakup with Jordan, the whole acting career possibilities were deleted from her mind.
“Hello, Jen. What’s up?” Carla asked while flopping down on her bed. She was just not interested anymore.
“Well, I don’t know how to say this but I will anyway. Carla, you’ve got the role!” Jenny exclaimed. Carla sat up so fast that her stomach turned into a knot and it was getting tighter and tighter as the news started to sink in. Then a thought occurred so fast in her mind that she spat it out without knowing that she did
“Wait, does this mean I’m not going back to school?”
“Well, yeah but you know the rule here in UK. They will get you a private tutor because you’re still underage and GCSEs is compulsory. Why? Is anything the matter?” Jenny asked, concerned. Carla said no and hung up the phone. She was looking forward to going back to school. To the comforting arm and words of her friends for her mending heart. Now all she can look forward to is nothing but acting as somebody else.

The next day, Jenny was in Carla’s house. The production of the movie was to start immediately. Mrs. Garner was so proud of her daughter as she knew her daughter’s dream was coming true and so she did not understand why Carla looked as if her deadline had arrived. She made a questioning look to her daughter.
“I just feel like I wish I could go back to school. You know, after the Jordan-crisis. I mean it’s not like you did not help. I just wish to have someone to agree with me. To bitch about Jordan.” Carla sighs. Her mom had widened her already big eyes when she said the B word but she could not help feeling so depressed. She is going to be away for about 9 months from the people she loves. She drank her last drop of the chocolate coffee her mother made for her. She hugged her mom and tears started to flow down naturally.
“Write to me everyday, mom. I am going to miss you so much.” Carla said, her voice croaked as more tears flowed down. Her mom wiped her tears and kissed her forehead. It was comforting and they hugged one last time as Carla let go of her mom and walked out of the door and walked to Jenny’s car. Carla went in the car and Jenny reversed out of the drive way and onto the road. Carla waved until her mom was out of sight.
“You ready?” Jenny asked.
“No, but I will be later.”

Wow! What a day it has been for me. Finally, after so many ages, I turly had fun. For the past 2 days, yours truly, went to an even that was called "THE 3RD ASIAN SCHOOLS VOLLEY BALL TOURNEMENT" at Republic Polytehnic! At first i thought it was a GIRL tournement but since, yours truly is a luck stars, the heavens was on my side. IT WAS A BOYS TOURNEY!!!! Just imagine my excitement. But, of course, it was not all fun and game, we had to complete the real task. The actual reason why we were even there. To mop the floors. Haiz. So when we were first came, we were brief by the teacher in charge. So he gave us a new term. We weren't moppers people, we were floor handelers. No difference, really. Weather we liked it or not, we were still cleaning the floors. But all was not lost, you could say we got the VVVVVIP seats. Hahaha, right in front.....upclose and personal.
So, the first match was....i forgot. But all i know is(Okay, I know this is pretty shallow, but I can't help it) there were alot of HANDSOME, CUTE, HOT guys around. I felt like I was given a treat! Now don't say that I am such a superficial person, I am just a girl appreciating God's great creation on men! Now there's nothing wrong with that. So here's the list of the countries that has hot guys in it.
Singapore- No. 6 and 12
Indonesia-No. 1
Vietnam- No. 14 and 9
Thailand- No. 4,3 ,7,and 12
Sri Lanka- No. 2
Okay, so that's all i guess....Most of the Hong Kong players were smoking hot but I could not have the memory to remember their jersey number. Too excited I guess. You should have watch the match between Thailand and China!!! It was so exciting, I did not even sat down through out the match. It was a fast match!!! And Thailand won!! I don't know why I was so excited. I am not even a Thai. Maybe because there were alot of 'eye-feasting' boys inside! Hahaha... okay I saw that look, I'll stop being such a bimbo.
I had alot of fun dancing to the songs they were playing during each intervals. The songs were replayed over and over and over.........
But I could not stop myself dancing to Justin Timberlake's songs. He's really such an impressive singer/songwriter.
Not to metion hot.
Okat, maybe without the facial hair, I suppose.
Anyway, we took some pictures with the Thailand players. Lucky as I have always been....No surprise here, I was standing beside the hottest guy in the group....NO. 4!!!!! hahaha....I'll post it here once Fiona send me the picture!!! HAHAHAHA! So that was it I guess. Pretty interesting. I love this type of days where I had innocent fun...okay maybe not so innocent since most of the time I was looking at the guys like some lost love puppy.....but it was great fun to spend around my best friends, Isabella and Christine, and made new friends along the way!
I am loving it!

So I am doing this on daily basis I see....Well, the more i do it the more I like letting my feekings known to the world. I find it very relaxing. So anyways, today was a very freaky day. Hafizah lend me her MOB book and I almost lost it (Don't worry Hafizah, the book is safe.) lucky I did not panic though I have to admit when the book was temporarily lost in McDonalads, my heart was thumping itself against my chest so hard, I was surprised that it did not leave a mark. Hahaha. Being lame as usual. So that was an exciting yet scary moment for today and the most annoying thing about this little adventure is that it had to happened when I was already on the way home and the time was so late. I reach home at about 9pm. I feel so tired. I wrote a song today in IRP lessson in school. I am going to show you guys after I write the entry of today. I think it;s a real cool song I've ever created. Most people whom I've confide the poem with said it was a cool song. I hope somebody can come out with the melody and tune for me so I could sing my OWN song. Gonna feel real cool if I finaly sing what I've written from the bottom of my heart. I guess it will sound more sincere if you wrote your own song.

I've beem reading this book for stress relief; 1003 great things about being a woman.
It's an amazing book though it's just simple sentences and quotes. I really love it. All the woman in the world should read it (don't woory, girls, I wasn't paid to advertise this), it's the kind of that put a smile on your face when you truely need it. I find it so funny cause today when i read that book OUT LOUD girls were nodding in agreement. I really felt GIRL POWER! It was so fun. I mean it's a harsh world for us, woman, no one can deny. So reading this book would make us feel sooooooo good. Cause we beating guys in so many ways that I did not even realize. OK enough of ego boosting...

(Verse#1)
Yeah...
I think about you
You know I do
But I have to fight it
This feeling for you

(Verse#2)
Oh..wooo...oh
I see you looking over here
It's a longing of so many years
This feeling's driving me insane
No, baby, don't make me stay

Chorus
Cheat on him(NO!)
I can never do that
Cheat on him(NO!)
I can't and I won't
Because......
I've pledge my heart and soul
To him

(Verse#3)
If only you'd came earlier
We might have this, dear
It doesn't matter anyway
Cause you can't make me stay

Chorus

Bridge
Me and him share kisses
Under the moonlight
Me and him Share misses
In the daylight
No, I can't cheat on him

(Chorus)x2

Hey People....sorry for the pic, such a soreeye. But anyway, I just wanted to put a picture of myself. This blog is full of other people and my thoughts...It needed some spice to it. And I am a SPICE! HAHAHA

So actually, I am here to confess something that has been bruising my heart and hurting my soul. I think I have develop an evil inside of me. I fell so dirty and so angry all the time. It's irate me to the core because I don't understand this feeling of hatered to so many people. I really don't know what to do. I don't want to be a hater but I am hating people who are only being themselves. I feel so slefish and I feel like my soul is being killed as I hate more and more people. Why is this happening to me? Why can't I be the girl who is hated than the girl who is hating? Somebody please explain why I am being so angry and why am I always hurting people's feelings?

I think I need serious help. I hate myself so much for feeling this way but I don't want to lie to myself and fake. I don't want to lie to anyone and say I like them when I don't. But I don't want to hurt anyone anymore. What am I supposed to do? I feel so so so so so evil.....I need help.

Stop me!

I feel so dirty,

Let the rain fall please.

I wanna cry

Don't stop me

Why don't you stop me?

Stop me from lying

Through my teeth

Why don't you stop me?

Stop me from hating

you...

I feel unclean

My soul is broken

I wanna stop this

But I know that I can't

So won't you please stop me?

From tearing my soul apart

Please just stop me

From breaking your heart

Why can't I look at myself?

Maybe it's time for me

To get out of this skin

To put a fake one

And try not to be

me.......

The day went on as usual with the lazy morning wake up call. felt sooooo gorgy..Then went out of the house ALONE and went down to the busstop. Nothing really happened. It's a totally boring day except for that all my friends were super tired especially Christine....she claimed she only slept 2 hours the day before....pooor girl. The MANY TESTs are killing me soooo ever slowly.. I wonder why this is not first degree murder..ha ha ha ha
Anyway, I am in the bus..nothing to do so just blog. I am so sick of so many people in school and I hate soooo many people, I feel evil...Wow...in the bus and the guy beside me is an artist, I am looking at his work right now. It's really nice. Super HOTTTT. Oh ya, if you notice there's 2 video clips i put which is totally a non famouse person.....My sister chance over it and i think he is super hot!!!! I wanna marry HIM!!! That make him....err...number 157????Ha ha ha ha...Crazy. I dreamt i got married....hahahahaha....I loved that dream and i still want to marry....NOW! AH AH AHHAHAHAHAHA.......oh yeah thanks christine in saying I've got talent. You're the first to say that.......and to isabell too.....Love u guys to death. I think the friends curse is off me.....GREAT!

So the day went by, and it's been so long since I've updated this blog. Yesterday had so much fun when my buddies came to my CRIB! Had so much fun except that YJ was such a party spoiler. He hardly said anything at all.......which i think its cool, i mean it's a free country, isn't it? Okay. What was my point again? Never mind, I am just confusing myself.
So I woke up at 4a.m to clean the house for the guest...(hem hem) Then I went back to bed. Ha ha ha ha ha ha . My eyes could not hold. So woke at 9:30a.m and went to take a bath......so i smsed my buddies who were still at home when they're staying across the island......bad estimation so end up my friends came around at noon. So we didn't really start at the real work we're supposed to do...we really extremely slack. And christine brought her guitar and started singing and I started to feel so swayish...(is that even a word?)...cause her voice is an angelic voice!!!! I love x3 her voice! And i felt a little jealous, I must say...cause my voice is so 'nowhere' compared to her( No offence, christine. I still luv U loads!!) I bet all the three we gagaga over christine voice. At the very end of yesterday, we (that is to say me and Christine) sang a m2m minus 1 song. I can't remember what we sang....but it was fun. I want to perform for the teachers day thingy but I don't think I will go if Christine is not up for it. I think people would seriously throw tomato at me if I were to sing solo........
So today nothing really happened....I just got this poem playing in my head....sorry you guys...you can don't read it....ha ha ha ha..it's a free world.....ain't it?

The Title:
It's Not Easy

You're saying I'm the one
Again
You're pleading I should stay
Again
You're calling me at night
Again

You think it's easy
You think you smart
But don't you even realize
That I don't want you back
You think you cool
You think you hot
But don't you even realize
That I don't give a damn

Stop calling me your girl
I ain't even your homey
It's not easy to get back, boy
Don't you even think
I ain't coming back to you
Can;t you see, boy
Your love ain't never coming through.....

Hey peeps! So today was an ok day, until the unreasonable gave us a test at the spur of the moment....Was so pissed lah! I mean Ms. Unreasonable didn't even thought us the skill and yet it's for promos...so weird, right? Man, what am I doing, again? BITCHING....haiz.maybe I am such a....what's the word? Oh yeah, a freaking gossip spreader!
By the way, I am going to save from now on so I am sooooo hungry, going to die soon if I don't eat but what to do? I have to save for Harry Potter!!! Oh you don't get what I mean? Right let me explain....
So I lend my two precious souls to my friends (HALF BLOOD PRINCE & THE DEATHLY HOLLOWS) so I am souless....I decided it was time to buy the whole set of Harry Potter's Book series. I found one at Amazon.com. It was such a beautiful set. It's in a treasure chest (to all harry potter fan, I recommened you go and take a look at it!) It cost around $200, so I desperately need to save from now.....It will be out in september!!! I just have to have it, own it!

So yeah, I know some may think that I am such a weirdo, but I seriously think this is my passion you know. So please understand and not judge me, thanks eh....

So this is to my friend that asked me this question 2 days ago "Shilla, how you mend a broken heart" (I hope this will help)
OK, so I am not going to say the typical saying to you, all that just-let-it-go shit (sorry for the language peeps, but I am kinda pms-ing right now). So, honestly, there's really no 'real' way to mend a broken heart. It's always about how you deal with it. Babe, I know it's hard but let me tell you one thing, cause I don't really know your situation, it's his loss. Maybe yours too. So you both are suffering and as the saying goes "WITHOUT SUFFERING THERE WILL BE NO COMPASSION." I strongly recommend you to cry one last time. This time, cry as loud, as painful, as pityful and you like. Just let it all out. It's time to feel sorry for yourself. Serious, that's what I did. And it helps,crying. Then the next step, you got it right, to forgive that person. It really heal your heart the right way. And after reading your blog....you do know how you're a precious girl worth to be a treasure. (distracted by Nisa....Dunno what to write)
So don't worry.....the mending will happened, just deal with the pain for now....It's what makes us human, like Prof. Dumbledore said to harry in OOTP.
So did I helped? Must tell me via sms ok?

So...anything else to write? Let me ponder for a moment.....
OH YEAH....
I LOVE YOU HARRY POTTER!

Hey people.....as you can see i have made my blog a music video blog. There's a few music vid that I've put for your entertainment....So why you might asked that I am still awake so late in the morning? Well, cause I can't sleep, ha ha ha, I know lame reason, right? Anyway, tomorrow there is school. I do not feel like going though. It's going to be a freaking long day and I am so going to be tired as the reason is why I am still able to write in so late at night

Well, today or tonight, whichever you guys prefer, I am going to talk about accepting who you really are. So I am a fat girl, I would never deny it and I am not going to say that when I was younger that I felt I was not beautiful. That would be a lie. Almost everyday in my secondary school life, I felt like I was the most ugliest being on earth. I am ashamed of it, I must say but it is part of growing up, I guess. People keep telling me I had a beautiful personality. But it was never enough. Guys I've been crushing on reject me without even wanting to know me. I felt like I was cursed. I cried. Crying might have help me but it did not heal me properly.

Up until recently, when I look at myself in the miror, I see how beautiful I am. Eventhough I am fat, there's nothing wrong with that. I can lose the weight if I want to and I know I can. I will. But I still see that I am beautiful and I don't have to try so hard to get guys to like me or even may one day love me because I found the remedy for my broken soul....I need to love myself and tell myself everyday that I am beautiful and so I did. I never felt so happy in my life.

Of course, it would help if you have amazing friends around you. My friends have been nothin but supporting me. They, too, I believe, can see the beauty in me and I love them for making me feel great all the time.

To all the girls who are not happy with themselves no matter what the reason. Be it being fat or being thin. If you're not happy, take a look at yourself in the mirror. A long look. See the beauty in you and if you hear voices saying that you're not beautiful....SHUT THEM OUT. People who have problems with others have big insecurity about themselves. They're not happy with their own body and face that they taunt others to feel superior. Trust me, embrace your beauty and soul. You will feel so much better like you never felt before. I am living proof.

Hey peeeps.....I am having a bad tempered mood today and I just had a major fight with my friend....and he is pisssed with me. Not that I am not sad, but i couldn't take it any longer. I hope my message will get through his head anyway....It's hard and harsh but he has to come to reality. Anyway, I have done some of my homework, though I never finish it. Did I tell you I have finish my MALAY project? Yeah, finally done with it. It was not fun though I have to admit. The project was kind of rushed. Pretty pathetic, if you asked me.

Anyway, I have put two music video here. It's nice tho. I love 'break you' especially. Really really cool. So i have not much to say....so I just write a poem.

P.S To Y.J
sorry u became my victim of my pms.

It's not my fault
I have been your friend all this time
It's not my fault
I tried to tell you It's not fine

You keep telling me again
It's not your fault
We end up finishing
Our friendship

I hurt you and I am sorry
But if that is the only way
To make you see
Then I have nothing to say

How could you say
That I am insulting you
How could you say
Everything that was not true

Well, I don't think
We can mend anymore
This is it.

Hey, ppl! Check out my great blog! I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! Thanks to christine of course! ha ha! She took the time to help me do all this stuff, it's so great. I mean this is total me, you know. A Harry Potter FREAK. So what happened today? Alot of yawning and fustration! Firstly it was Management Of Business in the freaking morning and I was so bored out that i don't understand anything at all. Then Pansy (Hafizah) wrote me a letter. And we started our fantasy argument (the usual Harry Potter vs. Draco Malfoy). It's lame, but it was fun. I had great fun in the end. Then after that we went for....I totally forgot. Then Nisa and I discussed about malay project. Wow, I hope I did at least a decent job on the mother tongue and tomorrow, ONE PROJECT DOWN! Now, don't be too happy for me. There's like 5 more projects and they have ridiculous timeline. I am going bonkers in this school. It's draining my strength away and I am supposed to able to handle the stress right now...I am freaking 19.

Oh yeah, talking about age brings me to the date of my birthday; 23 September. Guess what? It's the day before promos examination! Such luck bestowed upon the PRINCESS POTTER. You know, I've been thinking that maybe, right, Joanne Katherine Rowling should tell more about what happened to Harry's career....I think he's the minister of magic...huhuhuhuhuhuhu!
He should be. ok....I am being ridiculous....SHOULD JUST STOP BEING A FREAK!

BUT I CAN'T!

To That Someone...Who seriously Have a Problem With ME being FAT

So hi.....Ok the title, I will explain later...too happy to think about that. Anyways, two days ago my life was complete. Wanna know why? Well, J.K Rowling last Harry Potter series has finally reach the ending. (people who are reading this blog right now and is reading Harry potter and the deathly hallows...please shut this down now...I don't want to spoil it for you)



The ending.....it was amazing and scary. Beautiful though, but there were alot of bump and bruises along the way. It is, i assure you, the most most most darkest book. I love every part of it. You will never get bored of it. HARRY WAS THE ONE WHO DIED AND WAS REVIVED AGAIN. FYI, not only two character who died. J.K Rowling might have wrote only 18 chapters when she said that to the press and the news about the last book because more than 2 people died....here's the list:
Alastor "Mad-Eye" Moody
The Minister of Ministry of Magic
Nymphadora Tonks Lupin
Teddy Tonks
Remus Lupin
Fred Weasley (OMG!!!!!!!!)
Colin creevey
Hedwig (Yup, be shock....she did not even spare that poor owl's life)
Dobby The Free House Elf
The heroes who died while battling the DEATH EATERS from Hufflepuff, Slytherin, Ravenclaw and most definitely GRYFFINDOR.
The teacher who thought MUGGLES STUDIES in Hogwarts wittchcraft and wizardry
Grindewald (The DARK wizard that Dumbledore faught.)
Crabbe (Draco's Malfoy pathetic sidekick....he kinda killed himself actually....casting a cursed fire around and got fried in the end. HOW STUPID WAS THAT? But I don't think anybody really cares about him. Anyway.)
Dirk and a few goblins.
The wand maker For Durmstrung Boys....I forgot his name.


For your great relieve.....
Hermione, Ron, Ginny, Luna, Seamus, Neville and Dean did not die. More to the interesting part........Hermione and Ron got married and had children and Harry and Ginny too. It was a great ending. A happy one. A deserving series. I cannot imagine anyone who want Voldemort or more to say TOM RIDDLE...(I dare....) win and there was no ending. I think J.K Rowling would get killed and the sales would definitely drop. People would tell and people would be tooo appalled to read an ending that doesn't has one. I think KIDS who stayed all night just to read more that 5000 pages in total would be devastated. And, come on guys, it was a children books in the beginning until we, the adults, started craving for a fairytale. So, I think everyone should be sastified.

To J.K Rowling,
You are the most amazing writer I have ever come across. I cannot thank you more how the HARRY POTTER SERIES has change my life and views of life. How friendship and courage and definitely LOVE proves to be the greater powers of all powers. I was not your fan when you first published the books. I did not even took notice and I am most definitely ashamed of it. I only got to know about the HARRY POTTER SERIES until my friend put that stuff right beneath my nose and made me read it. I can't thank that friend more cause if he had not done that, I would not have knew this amazing skills of yours to pull me through the rough time I had. J.K Rowling your beloved skills and books would be missed. It's sad to know that no more book after this would come out but if you are reading this (which is at great odds) i want to thank you again. YOU CREATED A LEGEND.

To That person On the TITLE.

Just because you're perfect,
Does not give you the right,
To insult me behind my back.

Just because you're beautiful,
Does not give you the right,
To laugh at my beautiful flaws.

Just because you're not fat,
Does not give you the right,
To make me uncomfortable

Just because guys are chasing after you,
Does not, in anyway, give you the right,
To look so smug and arrogant.

Please look at yourself in the mirror,
I know it's horrible when you do,
You're scared if i speak,
I am definitely much more beautiful,
THAN YOU.

To my friends....you know who I am talking about....he he he.

Yesterday.............A day to never forget!

Yesteday, the day that I saw Ian McKellen......The guy who act in X-men and LOTR. It was a play called King Lear. I basically understand the first few part but after awhile.....I totally lost track of time. It was a surreal blur. But i do get some part. And when shakespeare decided to have a tragic play....he really mean it. All the character died in the end....except for Edgar and a few servant. I think Kent went to kill himself. I am not sure, I have to read the play to understand.
So then the play ended at 11:45...Almost all transport were gone. But there were some bus home left....I could take it. But for Isabella, it was kinda problem. But, i didn't wait to see what happened....I am such a bad friend. Haiz. I apologized for thinking about myself.........to Isabella. So, all in all....the only good thing that happened is that i saw a super star...even that was so far up and i could not even see his face.....hmm...maybe it's not a good thing after all!

hey I am back with my story

sO....I took one day to actually re-think the story....So anyway, this dude(if u haven't read the story below, u should be ashame of yourself!) name was Jeff, and amazingly, he was a muslim, which i don't know why is so surprising to me. Maybe i am too much a bimbo! ha ha ha....so i guess all the four of us look like nice people so he decided to chat with us, which was cool cause we learnt so much from him...like firstly he was a paramedic so he gave us suggestion tips on what to do if we have problem with our body. i have no problem except the fact that my body extra fat and i know the solution to it so i did not ask him anything at all. So like the saying always goes, TIME FLIES WHEN YOU'RE HAVING FUN. next thing i knew we were talking and it was already 8:45 pm. so the girls started to pack and we went to the toilet leaving YJ with Jeff. so when we were out of the toilet...christine look at the arrival tv and saw a flight from korea...being a DBSK obsessed fan, she seriously thought of them(i read her blog) and so we waited......and waited......and waited.....no DBSK. ha ha ha...and we went back home....leaving Jeff...even though we look like university student, all of us didn't thought of a way to keep in contact with Jeff...not even asking for E-MAIL! How smart was that? So that's about the event that happened on saturday.
So what happened TODAY?
Not much...YJ didn't came cause his wisdom tooth "conveniently" needed attention and so...he plucked out the wisdom tooth and do not need to come to school for a WHOLE WEEK! So it is just the gals and me. Then, we had our lesson in school and we didn't do any project for 2 days and tomorrow there's this stupid movie that we're all supposed to go at esplanade. What a waste of time, seriously. And on SATURDAY, THE BOOK HARRY POTTER WILL BE RELEASED AND I AM GOING TO HAVE IT! I wonder what's going to happened. I really hope Harry won't die. Please just make it a HAPPY ENDING. It's just the right thing to do, J.K Rowling....It's a 7 series book for heaven sake.
You know i asked alot of people if they're excited for the MOST anticipated book....not many of them cared!
AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES SOOOOO MUCH OF WHAT WILL HAPPPENED TO HARRY POTTER IN THIS FREAKIN SCHOOL?

I Think I just DELETED everything...haiz.

Hey there Peeps! It's been a short day today and I am home so early. So i thought to change my blogskin...It seems like a smart move...but seriously, it was not. I think I've lost everything I ever wrote in this blog...well now i guess i have to start anew, haven't I? So let's start by the story last saturday. It was the day where my literature group wanted to discuss about the project. So yours truely decided to meet at dhoby ghaut station. But it was all a distorted process, cause christine"don't worry, by september, I will have my phone" was impossible to get contact. I met YJ first, as usual....sloppy as always and so we waited. So, if anyone know YJ and I, they should know that we cannot stand the sight of each other and so, being the girl that has nothing better to do, started to shoot YJ with all my nonsense and believed it or not guys, YJ actually entertained by defending himself....which is, of course, pathetic. So in the midst of me winning my argument with YJ, my phone rang and christine voice cam through. I could hear she was abit pissed having waited about 1/2 hour. Then the three of us waited for Isabella. She came an hour later....but she told us before hand so it was cool....anyway, my brilliant idea backfired again by me making a decision to study at P.S! Being a weekend, i was to blind to see the signs that people would want to go shopping! Amazingly stupid...i felt like a total BIMBO. Anyway, we went to the airport instead. So we wasted alot of time...seriously. So Christine suggest we go another terminal, cause the terminal we were in were awfully crowded...but that decision was a dreadful mistake. Why? Well, this terminal was just as crowded and even more noisier...but we settled anyway...our project was literally shouting at us.
So then we're doing our stupid project, hate it, hate it, hate it. Then, suddenly, some guy asked us if he thought the speech he made were good for his students. when he was talking, I FELT LIKE I WAS IN BIMBO WORLD. I understood nothing. So christine asked if he ws teaching a University students and he answered yes.
"I think they will understan...cause we're not university student." Christine said.
"Oh, Ok" said the small dude. You know what that means? The four of us look like UNIVERSITY STUDENT!
And yet, here i am struggling with my school.....write in later to finish this story....
It's a long one.

Omg!!! Today was an amazing day...well everything did not realy turn out rite but we (Isabella, Christine, Y.J and me) had so much fun! Well, we did get something out for the lit project. We got what each character was supposed to be and then we found a new friend. Jeff. He's nice u guess....we talk alot. Mostly it was guys vs girls...and as we all know, Y.J always losing in the end..thanks to mui....hahaha. Ok, i think i sound evil. But nevermind. well, all of us talk about different topic. Like marriage. Wow, I hope to get married. i hope someone does wanna marry me. Marriage would be a nice step to take with someone u truely love. someone u wana give ur soul to. Haiz.....what a beautiful life would that be? Amazing i guess.

But anyway, let's talk about another topic. Harry potter!!!! I went to watch the movie on the public premier. I am not trying to be biased here but i really feel strongly that it is the best movie ever produce by any other director for Harry Potter movie series. It's not a children flick anymore. It's dark and intense. I have to admit they change quite a few stuff....but the point of the story was still there and it's seriously difficult to put more that 700 pages into a 2 and half hour movie. You've got to give David Yates the credit! So if anyone wanted to watch Harry Potter...do it fast! you won't be dissappointed! Trust me!

Omg...I think yesterday entry was so overrated. I really didn't know what i was feeling...but i definitely was feeling down. That's why death was on my mind. I just reviewed one of my classmate's Blog. It was so sad...and here I thought that My family is the only one having problem. The only one in the world that is feeling that DOOOM DAAAY is going to happen the next minute. I never thought i was so wrong.....I just read Max(MY CLASSMATE) Blog.....and I was taken by surprise...Max, is a smiley guy...i would never thought he had a lot of problems...but he does. I won't say what his problem is cause it's his privacy...so if u want to know u have to be friend of his....cause i am. Anyway that's not my point of writting this blog....After reading Max's blog, I finally see that other people DO have problem and yet they're still smiling. I think from now, I am going to look at life in a different light. The positive side. It's hard, I know but I am still going to try. Compared to the problem Max is having......Mine is nowhere close to him. Now I feel like being SUPERWOMAN or a GENIE. Give everyone in the world 3 wishes....this is actually making me smile....i can't believe this....

I am so lost. I feel like crying all the time. Life is not doing good for me. I am, for sure, going to brak down soon. I don't "fit in" in class. I wis things were better for me....I can't like anyone because there's a voice inside my head that keeps repeating I ain't good enough for him. Heck, ain't good enough for anyone....
I feel so depressed in clazz...if it wasn't for Isabella....I would be a goner...for sure. Thank God. Bless her soul for me, Allah SWT.
So I have been thinking that I might commit suicide soon....but that's just my thoughts.....good day everyone.

hello...wow! It's been ages since i wrote in here...Election's over!!! It was interesting wasn't it!!!! I was holding my breath when the annoucement for Aljunied GRC....Man, it was a close fight between PAP and WP. But i won't say further.... I am only 18....What do I know? But, i am glad with the result, personally...Anyway, it was realy interesting! I, for a first time, actually like the campaign. I followed news.....AND I NEVER WATCH THE NEWS. Well anyway, it was all for a good cause, right? So guess how my life is going on...well, it is ok. Nothing happened. Very boring. Exa is going to be over tomorrow.....i am quite confident i am going to get A2 for mathematics.....I am sure of that Literature is going to be doomed...it's going to be a C5 or more. Shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the first time..Exams are not tough but extremely boring! I seriously hate my class...I hate NADIA!!!! gosh, just because she got a firece eyebrow means i am scared of her???? Get a grip ok? I wish i could just....i better not say, if not what i said can be use againts me in the court of law!!!!! well, anyway i feel sick, because i should be in POLYTECHNIC. so so so so so so so sick. I need a break.
So, i feel like i should just take off school and just startmy career!!!!i wanna be a host, of a tv presenter or anything in the entertainment media. i wanna work for lime!!! i wanna be an entertainment journalist. I can go and interview all my stars! Especially Justin Timberlake... I'll go Bonkers!! i will dream as follows.
I go to the interview room. There he is Justin. SO HOTTTTTT!!!!!!
Me: Hello. I am shilla, from lemon magazine. How's your day.
Justin: You are so beautiful.
Me: Ha ha ha! I am not sure of that. So, what is it like to be a sex symbol?
Justin: Am i? I didn't know...You are really beautiful
Me (blush like crazy): Yeah, so what would you say about your new album, Not justified?
Justin: Hmm, it's partially rap and ballad. Not alot of people do that. I don't know what's happening but i think you are really beautiful
Juatin takes me in his arms....and we flew to the garden of love......
HA!!!! LIKE THAT WOULD HAPPENED TO ME!!! I THINK I AM SERIOUSLY GOING CRAZY!!!SOMEBADY SAVE ME FROM THIS MADNESS! I AM GOING TO BONKERS. OH NO....I HAVING A headache....panadol please.....

Don't Kiss And TeLL...It is So not cool

I cannot believe BOYS! hah! I mean seriously who do they think they are? Why do they even kiss and tell? I bet they think it's totally awesome when in fact it make the look stupid. Okay, Boys if u wanna kiss and tell, do it. But not in BLOGS!!! God, telling your friends is one thing....but telling the whole world? Now that's beyond foolish. REAL MAN don't do this. They definitely don't go around saying, "I slept with her. And her. And her." Haiz...what is happening to this world? Maybe because Kiamat is near. And BOYS please...we do not need details about your sex life. I mean puuuurrrrllllleeeeaaaasssseeee.....IT IS DISGUSTING! ARGH! So all the boys and pervs oout there... i think all of you need a life.

I miss you....SO much...but you never ever...hear me...why? Do you really hate me? What have i done? Why are you hurting me so much, especially when you r doing nothing about us?? I STILL LOVE YOU. I do A'sri......I need you to calm me down...to hear my tears...to laugh with me....i need you in my life....i cannot let you go. I don't know why? Am i being punished for just loving you?

well...what a day it has been!!!!!!wow...o's coming soon and i am not worried....that is why i am worried coz i am not scared!!! that is totally freaking!
i hate it!!!!!!! nothing's working out for me....i am still stuck with my past....you know once o level over i am going to jump!


jump out of joy that means.....

hey peeps!!!!you today is the most freaking dissapointed day of my life!!!!!!!!!i hate it! i got a b3 for mother t!!! can u believe it. expecting a 2 but in the end get three....sob sob sob!!!! help! but anyway not that disappointed though! ha ha ha ha considered quite good already. so far been just pass for me...now b3...not bad..... anyway...i'll be coming back tml...ok...be blogging again. so bye!

MAKE IT CHIRPY, MAKE IT COOL
EVERYONE DESERVE TO LIVE
GUESS WHAT?
SO DO YOU!!!
YEAH!


WHY CAN'T U?
I'M LAYING IN MY BED
THE TEARS RUSHING DOW LIKE A RIVER
SO MAMY MEMORIES SWIRLING MY HEAD
COULD YOU CRY ME A RIVER?

WHY CAN'T U JUST B TRUE?
Y CAN'T U B MINE?
NOW MY HEART BROKEN IN TWO
MY LIFE IS AT THE MERCY OF TIME

I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT RIGHT NOW
I AM ALL ALONE W/O U
THE SHOWS OVER AND U'RE TAKING A BOW
I CAN'T BELIEVE U SAID WE'RE THROUGH

Y CAN'T U JUST LOOK AT ME?
LOOK AT WHAT U'VE DONE TO ME
Y CAN'T U JUST LOVE ME LIKE U DID?
IS THERE ANOTHER BESIDE ME?

NOW I STUMBLE ON EVERY STEPS
I CAN'T STAND TALL
IF THIS IS CALL MY LIFE AT BEST
I CAN'T IMAGINE ANOTHER FALL

it has been like half a year!

hey peeps.....what's up? i hope everything is going well for you. well one thing is for sure....i am mending a broken heart...if you dunno what i am talking abt...go to my other blog: www.shillchill.blogspot.com
well...read from there and you will know my condition. well right now...i am this freaking chatting room...where i can totally kill my brain. Firstly, i totally dun understand why Muhammad 'Asri is totally giving me a cold shoulder when i should be the one doing that. but nevermind.....life has it's ups and down...one day i tell you!!!!!!!!!one day! haiz so sick.....fine bye for now